stupid i'm not

but in love i am

however seems to feel like one in the same

reagrdless to whom made me this way

i only have myself to blame

caught up in the moment i let love guide me

but was he in love with me

or was it lust for my body

FOOLS Gamble TWICE

i was only with you a few weeks
but there was something about you that made me weak
to beleive your every word, and feel no self control
to let my guard down and take a trip on love road
even though i driven down that sacred road before only to make a U turn and find out "love dont live here anymore"
but i once heard a wise person say..
being able to fall in love means being able to take chances
so here i am with the dice
and this voice in my head telling me only fools gamble twice
so mabe i'm a fool......

IM NOT OVER HIM, IM STILL FALLING FOR HIM GAME

I thought I was almost over him
I admit I was tired of the games
but to have him in my life I will endure the pain
damn I know I'm a fool for allowing him to play with my heart
but without him I feel incomplete like pieces spread apart
why do I put myself in this predicament to be hurt over and over again
this game of love is one in which I can never win
I despise of myself for being so vulnerable and heads over hill for a man
but these are the actions of my heart not something of which I had planned
when he wrap his hands around my waist I fall into a trance
thinking bout when we first laid down to do the grown up dance
stuck between a battle of the heart and the mind
mr heartache make me weak
like a person without a spine
thinking back to when I said I was almost through I can say that was a lie
I guess I have to wait til the day my love subside
shit, I m not over him but sometimes I wish I was
Is it wrong for me to be with the person that I love
Damn I'm not over him.....

contradictions

silence can be the loudest sound
while also being a state of peace
love can be strongest emotion
while also causing the worst pain
tears can be a sign of sadness, grief and unhappiness
while also symbolizing relief and joy
the world is full of oxymorons and contradictions which can be why so many people are often misunderstood. if possible i would like to look through the eyes of someone else and see how other percieve me, because of my joyful character do people see my tears as happiness when actually its pain and sadness.
misunderstanding can come from miscommunication and understanding of a person along with their feelings and outlooks.

lost without words
confused without thought
stuck with no escape
who would have ever thought
pain bottled inside
emotions unexpressed
the inner me causes my stress

The Real Me

No one really knows me,
because i barely know myself.
I hide behind many mask to avoid the hand that i was dealt.
So many people told me to forget expectation and be truthful with myself.
So here i am coming clean exposing the hand i was dealt.
I'm not this strong person that many take me to be,
I'm weak like a fragile baby, craving for my fathers strength to save me, no longer feeling like I'm part of his world, i went thirteen year while being his only baby girl, replaced and forgotten like a child's toy, i now search for the love of a man to fill that void.
I'm not confident nor am I secure, i have many flaws as i was told many of times before.
I'm no size two, i don't have a six pack, and unfortunately for me my hair don't flow down my back.
I'm darker in complexion, and thicker in size, I have a big butt with even bigger thighs.
Many people think that I'm always happy and never cry but only if they knew my eyes never runs dry.
I can cry a river or even an ocean I am not perfect I am still a human who have emotions.
Exposing the real me, i can now remove my mask and those people who dont except it can live in my past..